I have been in a bit of a funk lately. I can't seem to pinpoint why, but I could give a few reason why it may be happening. But I am not writing this to complain about what is going on in my head. Cause we would be here all night, and it wouldn't solve anything. However, as I impatiently wait for this "funk" to pass, I can't help but look at my kids and hope that they never have to feel the way that I have felt at many times in my life. I believe that they were put on this earth because they are strong enough to handle the hardships that go along with being a kid in this generation. But I never want to see them go through the things that I did, or worse, harder things, and not know what to do for them. I know that it is inevitable that this is going to happen. So I wrote them a letter of the things I hope that they can learn from my life experiences.
My sweet children,
As your Mom, I will always hope that you know how special you are. However, I know that it is not that easy. I remember coming home so upset because of a boy(most of the time your Dad:)) or trouble with friends and my parents would tell me,"Brother So and So, or Mrs. So and So has nothing but good things to say about you. They are always talking about how positive and friendly you are." I remember thinking, "Are you guys nuts? I don't care what YOUR friends think! That is not going to make that boy like me, or that girl be friends with me" I get it, at your age, the opinion of an adult is nothing more then a grain of sand. I wish I could tell you it will get easier, but it doesn't. Even at my age I watch people that I associate with get together and I wonder what its so wrong with me that they don't ever think to invite me. I hope that you can learn at a young age that it doesn't matter how many friends you have, or how often you get invited to do things. What matters is knowing who you are, and being confident in that knowledge.
As a teenager, I was so desperate to have friends that I was willing to compromise my morals, and do things that I knew were wrong just so I could feel excepted by my peers. All that got me was a ticket for $1,300, 40 hours of community service, and a huge moment in my life where I realized that I could never trust those people that I thought were my friends. It is never worth it to disrespect yourself in order to gain the "respect" of others.
NEVER GIVE UP! When you find your passion, the thing that you love, hold on to it until you reach your full potential. Never let anyone tell you that you cant do something. Never let them tell you that you are not good enough, or that you should just give up. YOU ARE GOOD ENOUGH!! You can do anything that you set your mind to. Never be afraid to try new things and push your limits. It OK to be a little scared sometimes, or to go outside of your comfort zone. Those are the things that will make you strong.
Kastyn, I never want you to feel like you are different then everyone else. Those things that make you different just make you, you. There is nothing wrong with having those little things that make us different, If we weren't supposed to be different we would all look the same. And though it may have made things easier, it would have also made for a boring life. You have a personality like no other person in this world. You are so smart and pick up on things so fast, we don't even know where these things come from. Always be YOU, and never let anyone make you feel like that isn't good enough.
My sweet Laynee, if there is one thing I want you to learn as a girl, it is to take care of, and love your body. I have always had insecurities with the way that my body looked, and I never want you to feel the way that I have felt. It is OK if you don't look like the girls on the magazines, or in the movies. Never compare yourself to other people. You don't know their story, and they don't know yours.
Always remember, we are not given tough times to punish us. We are given tough times to make us stronger. The things that we go through in life strengthen our relationships, and make us appreciate the things that we may have been taking for granted. Tough times never last, but tough people do. You are never alone. You will always have a Heavenly Father that is there for you. Turn to him often. Be strong! Love life! And always know that you are good enough!!
Love, MOM
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